Reflection on the township tour - Dylan Terry

5/14/11
“My sense of time is different here. I like to call it vacation time. Each day seems to move in normal time, maybe even a little slow, but on Friday the week seems to have flown by. Today is an example of that in miniature. Each part took extra energy to get through, but this morning was only a couple of hours ago. In reality, this morning was ten hours ago. Today: breakfast, Langa, Khayelitsha, townships, lunch, slave lodge, tour, deli, and dinner. And the day is not even over. If that didn’t already seem like a full day, all day was emotionally taxing. The townships were more than I was expecting. I wasn’t prepared to see as much as we did. I knew we would see poverty and pain but I did not realize we would visit a home and walk around. Standing in the cement box called a home made me feel ashamed. I wanted to take pictures to document my experience, but it seemed inappropriate. Like I was visiting something that wasn’t real. Like I was in a museum. But this was somebody’s reality. I was glad to heard him say not to feel awkward. He said that apartheid lasted for so long because it was in isolation. Showing the world the reality of South Africa can change people’s worlds. I still felt awkward though. I felt like I was making light of their situation. Or I was making too much of it. I still can’t tell which. Each bedroom was stuffed completely full: clothes, bedding, beds, just a plethora of things. This stood in stark contrast to the main room which had nothing but a table and a sink. Contrast seems to define this city. Half of the people wave and smile, usually the children, while the others stand, rooted, and stare. It’s hard to guess their emotions. The most contrast could be seen in Langa near the higher class home, or should I say close to the shanties? A street divided the two. Homes on one side and huts on the other. In the same way that the townships glare at the city from across a highway, the huts stand out against the garden and lawns of houses across the one lane street. But they don’t seem to glare with bitterness or resentment. They are just there. It’s like they are resigned to their place. The matter-of-fact nature of it hits me hardest. I am sure that at some depth, probably not even very deep, I will find resentment, bitterness, anger, shame, etc… But on this visit, people just stare without any of those. I think I felt the whole range of emotions just in the morning. Grateful for the experience. Excited at the opportunity. Shame for the disparity. Pain for the people. Those are just a few of the emotions I could find words for much less the many more that evade the proper vocabulary to really describe them. Lucy Campbell said to find yourself, to search for you. The township threw emotions in your face that forced you to look at yourself and begin to analyze.”